if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
