it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
