after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
