No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
You can't just leave with hair like that
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
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