i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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