my mouth tastes like poor choices
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
