We need to rekindle our bromance
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
