I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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