We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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