He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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