i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Let's paint friendship bongs
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
