They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize