I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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