And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
kristin has been a bad kristin
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
he quoted the bible to break up with me
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
