She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
