Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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