There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
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