I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
my poor anus
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
