i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
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Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
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Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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