All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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