He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
