Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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