Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
