Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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