we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
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And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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