I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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