New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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