i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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