I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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