this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
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