Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I feel like abortions should bother me more
my shit smells like andre
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
