well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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