i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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