Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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