Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
It's never too late to be topless.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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