Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
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