I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
