Fuck appropriateness.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
