I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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