yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
