Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
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