So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
