She went from zero to smokin in five shots
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I queefed so loud it echoed.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
is it fun? or sober?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
