My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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