Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
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