She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Floor bacon is actually really good
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
we're so committed to being not committed
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize