yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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