So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
