I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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