i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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