You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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