Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
